Delivered from a spirit of fear
The Lord is
my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?
The Lord is
the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?
When the wicked, even mine enemies and my
foes, came upon me to eat up my flesh,
They
stumbled and fell. Though an host should encamp against me, my heart shall not
fear:
Though war
should rise against me, in this will I be confident
Psalm 27v1-3
This is a personal testimony that
I have wondered much as to whether or not to post it, but we are now dealing
with and praying for so many dear souls who are suffering from panic attacks,
anxiety, worry & dread all of which are close cousins of a spirit of fear.
Which spirit of fear is controlling their lives more than the Spirit of God.
So, I believe it's right to now share just one of my personal experiences in how Father delivered me from
such and I trust it helps you also.
Large demons fled in terror before me
I read some
years ago about an experience that frequently haunted the late Kung Fu actor
Bruce Lee. In his re-occurring nightmare he would be confronted and terrified
by an undefeatable giant warrior. Lee confessed that these unwelcome dreams
always left him traumatised. I learnt about his experience several years after
my own similar situation in which, nightly, a dark and sinister force visited
our home terrifying and traumatizing me in the process. I understood well what
Lee had experienced. Here is my story …. I share it in the hope that some readers
can learn how in Jesus Name you can deal with your own demons!
It was the early 80s and we had
moved to a bigger rental house just a half a mile away from our previous let. Both
of our children were under 4 years old at the time and the extra bedroom was good
for our frequent guests. . The new rental was a two-storey building with
lounge, dining room & kitchen on the ground floor and a large cupboard that
would double as my little study. Upstairs was three bedrooms & bathroom. As
ideal as the move seemed outwardly.. Inwardly I had a struggle and little peace
that I should be moving to that location.
The area was denser in housing, spiritually much darker, clearly evident
by the broken lives of the people that lived there.
The move was not easy and there
were numerous hindrances and obstacles to our getting the place. In my imitable
style at that time I’d managed to circumnavigate my way around them,
unfortunately with less than righteous transparency than the Lord would have
appreciated. As much as I’d like to say otherwise, to get the house required a
deception on my part as I had informed the housing office there that it would
be a straight exchange with my friend that lived in the house already, but omitted
to mention that actually my friend had no intention of moving into our old
place. Exchange of homes was a way to trick the system without spending years
on the waiting list. How could I even think that the Lord could bless anything
that was based on a lie? Of course sincere repentance and a lesson learned
since that time.
During the application period, The
Lord warned me. I was driving past our local hospital and thinking how I could
push through the “perceived exchange” I clearly heard the Spirit of the Lord
whisper in my heart “The servant of the
Lord must not strive” A quote from 2
Tim 2v24. I knew exactly what that
meant, “Don’t do this George”. But, willfully and foolishly, I immediately
resisted the word, trying instead to justify that our growing family needed the
extra space and of course Father would grace my determined disobedience.
Experience such as this one has painfully taught me that it is extremely
dangerous to ignore the warning of the Lord.
The day of the move was the
beginning of the heads up that we were definitely shifting into a different
spiritual climate. Atmospheres and attitudes from near nieghbours soon revealed
that this new place was in no way as good as our last place. Our new home was
at the end of a long run of terraced houses with a large park and children’s
swing/play area directly in front. This also was an additional attraction for
our children to moving there along with the primary school just two hundred
meters to the end of the park.
We met and made our introductions
to our new nieghbours whilst still unpacking the removal van. Within the week the
impact of moving to a place with a “lesser” spiritual environment became apparent.
In one sense the visible element of community dysfunctionality was of course an
opportunity for outreach. In another way
the spiritual antagonism was easy to discern. Soon we were witnesses to
frequent drunkenness, domestic violence, and vandalism. Local children
considered our family car as goalpost for their soccer games or as a ladder to
retrieve their ball when it got stuck on the garage roofs. A strained tolerance
grew between us and our nieghbours in our new community.. We wrestle not
against flesh and blood.
After being there for a few
months there were two frightening occasions when I was violently awoken with
someone? Something? trying to choke me. Seeing nothing in the darkness,
alarmed, sweating and gasping for air, my confidence in falling back asleep was
shaken and so I would spend most of the night wide awake, wondering what on
earth happened and why. I’d had significant experience with casting out demons
up to that point in my life and with varying degrees of both success and
disaster but this was different, this was very up close and personal.
It was shortly after this that the
fear of the unseen increased as an evil presence began to visit nightly without
fail. Usually, I was in bed around 12pm then woken by quite frightening and
sinister occurrences around an hour later. The sequence of events was
consistent but no less terrorizing in their predictability. It began with heavy
deliberate footsteps on the stairs, directly across the passageway opposite our
bedroom door. It was a split-level stairwell and Mac, our German shepherd dog had
owned the middle level split as his personal sleep space. Usually, it was the
boom of a heavy footstep on the first wooden stair that woke me, followed by
every other footstep until this creature, whatever it was, slowly, terrifyingly
and deliberately arrived to stand rocking back on forth on the creaking floor
boards right outside our bedroom door.
As much as I’d like to say
otherwise, and despite a life time of trying to be courageous in every situation…
Despite one year of training in the Parachute Regiment, which was designed to
forge us into rough tough fearless weekend warriors, I was scared, very scared.
I would pull the covers over my head and pray for it to end. The slow thudding
footsteps were bad enough but in addition, Mac, our dog would begin this
soulful lamenting howl like I had never heard before. Usually fearless in the
face of challenge, Mac’s fear was vocal and obvious and would continue usually
for as long as the nightly episode lasted, which was usually ten to fifteen
minutes and it was a profoundly disturbing time.
And if that wasn’t enough, the
dog howling caused my four-year-old son Mikey in the next room to begin crying out
as if in a tormented nightmare, banging his head against his pillow while he
did so. On a few occasions love, loyalty and compassion demanded that I go and attend
to my troubled son. I would rush the few meters from my room to Mikey’s bedside,
flicking on the light as I went whilst braving the atmosphere of insidious
evil, which seemed to be standing directly outside our door in that dark lobby.
During these episodes Mikey would
be tormented and in a fitful like coma from which I couldn’t waken or calm him.
As if, tormented by something I did not know in another realm. Night after
night I felt increasingly hopeless & useless. Some nights the evil seemed
worse and its shameful to admit that the grip of fear was so strong over me that
I hid under the bed covers too cowardly to even run to my tormented sons aid. I
could only pray that soon the terror would pass and both my son and I could hopefully
find rest for the night. Next morning I’d always ask him how he slept? He would
always reply with a cheery “Ok Dad”, no apparent memory of the night’s trauma
that had again visited his wee soul and mine. Strangely, my wife & young daughter
never heard or experienced anything and thankfully always slept soundly. She
had no idea and I had too much pride and shame to tell her of what was actually
occurring in our home every night.
Dark days turned to weeks and long
weeks become months as I silently endured this emasculation of my masculinity
and erosion of my faith as a Son of God and the protector of my home. My confidence
was being trashed, I felt dominated and intimidated by these nightly evil
patrols. I was witnessing less than before as I felt a hypocrite testifying to
the power of God whilst living under a pall of secret terror. I knew no one
experienced to go to for prayer or council. A further block to my getting
through this was my stubborn pride that I had developed over the years as a camouflage
for many childhood insecurities, and so pride remained way to high to reveal
“the real frightened me”. In reflection it is easy for me now to see that it
was within these very unsanctified shadows in my own soul that allowed the
devil the right to attack and control me by fear. Equally, it provided my
Heavenly Father opportunity to expose my fear, pride and unbelief and
demonstrate Himself as my Strong deliverer. In His faithful love and mercy my
frailties and hidden fears provided an excellent arena for Father to reveal
that truly, in Him alone we are more than conquerors.
God knows that I cried out to
Him, daily, many times a day “Help me Lord Please help me, take this away from me,
from my home, from my son”. Well, it soon became obvious that Father had heard
my cry and began to answer me with amazing and appropriate daily verses. His
strategy for dealing with this slur against me His son, was surely different to
the tactic that I would have preferred. Whilst I wanted to run, He wanted me to
fight. The following verses just seemed to stand out in my daily bible
readings. I had never noticed those verses before. But by Fathers grace and
Spirit I was led to see verse after verse in preparation for the confrontation ahead.
These verses, to this day, have proved faithful and invincible weapons against
the strongholds of darkness and the day of battle. Which day was surely coming
though I didn’t know that at the time?
Out of the mouth of babes and suckling’s hast thou ordained strength because of thine
enemies,
that thou mightest still the enemy and the avenger Psalm 8:2 (Father will stop
the enemy through you even though you feel like a spiritual babe)
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the
shadow of death, I will fear no evil:
for thou art with me Psalm 23:4
(This verse was given as a command
to me to fear NO evil and to remember that the Lord is always with me)
For by thee I have run through a troop; band
by my God have I leaped over a wall Psalm 18:9 (I
never really understood this verse until after the deliverance, then it made a
lot of sense as I saw the literal fulfillment of it)
Though an host should encamp against me, my
heart shall not fear: though war should rise against me, in this will I be
confident Psalm 27:3 (This was another command NOT to
fear regardless of how many are set against you – This verse also made a lot of
sense after the confrontation)
The Lord is on my side; I will not fear: what
can man do unto me? The Lord taketh my part with them that help me: therefore
shall I see my desire upon them that hate me. Psalm 118:6,7 (Another command not to fear and to have confidence that the
Lord is with me)
One man of you shall chase a thousand: for
the Lord your God, he it is that fighteth for you, as he hath promised you Joshua
23:10 (He taught me here that numbers of the enemy
were as nothing to Him and should not be to me)
And I will give unto thee the keys of the
kingdom of heaven: and whatsoever thou
shalt bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt
loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven Matthew 16:18 (This
verse revealed to me that I had had given me authority to handcuff the enemy in
the invisible and the effects of which will be seen in the visible)
Behold, I give unto you power to tread on
serpents and scorpions, and over all the
power of the enemy: and nothing
shall by any means hurt you. 20 Notwithstanding in this rejoice not, that
the spirits are subject unto you; but rather rejoice, because your names are
written in heaven. 21 In that hour Jesus rejoiced in spirit, and said, I thank
thee, O Father, Lord of heaven and earth, that thou hast hid these things from
the wise and prudent, and hast revealed
them unto babes: even so, Father; for so it seemed good in thy sight. Luke
10:19 (Power over ALL the enemy, nothing can harm us,
He has revealed that to babes!)
Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that
loved us. For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor
things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other
creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ
Jesus our Lord Romans 8: 37-39 (Nothing, No one,
Nowhere, At any time can stop us – We win, We win, We win – These verses in
Romans really caused my faith to spill over)
Forasmuch then as the children are partakers
of flesh and blood, he also himself likewise took part of the same; that
through death he might destroy him that
had the power of death, that is, the devil; And deliver them who through
fear of death were all their lifetime subject to bondage Hebrews 2:14,15 (Now I understood that Satan was destroyed now not in the
future and that my fear of dying rather than trusting Christ’s finished work
was empowering him to torment our family – Fear hath torment 1 John 4:18)
I have written unto you, fathers, because ye
have known him that is from the beginning.
I have written unto you, young men, because ye are strong, and the word of God
abideth in you, and ye have overcome the wicked one 1 John 2:14
(Wow! Amen, this verse was another
big boost to my confidence)
Ye are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater
is he that is in you, than he that is in the world 1 John 4:4 (I had to make an adjustment to believe this verse either
it was true and I was a conqueror or it was a lie and I remained defeated – I
believed it)
For whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world: and this is the
victory that overcometh the world, even
our faith 1 John 5:4 (This verse stated a fact
that if I had simple faith then I was already an overcomer – Faith was growing
with embracing and quoting these scriptures all the time)
He that committeth sin is of the devil; for
the devil sinneth from the beginning. For
this purpose the Son of God was manifested, that he might destroy the works of
the devil 1 John 3v8 (Though I’d read this verse
many times I never understood it as the ultimate reason that Christ came and it
was a real confidence booster)
And they overcame him by the blood of the
Lamb, and by the word of their testimony;
and they loved not their lives unto the death Rev
12:11 (This verse assured me that because of Christ’s
blood I had a testimony that could overcome the devil if I would stand with it
and not flee)
There were actually many more
verses than these, in fact at the time I could hardly open the bible without
the Holy Spirit giving me a bible lesson in spiritual warfare and imminent
victory..
After several weeks of these
verses arresting me and meditating on them, I heard the Spirit’s inward whisper
one morning, after yet another disturbed night; He said “tonight you will face
your fears, fight and win”. I knew it was the Lord. What comfort these few words brought me, ha!
Also, what dread these few words brought me. I was nervous and excited all day
like a boy who knows he has a fight after school but feeling more than a little
confident that I will win.
TONIGHTS THE NIGHT
That night we retired to bed as
usual. My wife still oblivious as at the beginning, whilst I anxiously awaited
the moment of confrontation though I had no idea what would occur, if anything
or, what was expected of me? Many nights I had held the covers ready to pull
them over my head when the booming footsteps began and like a coward left my
son to cry out alone in his torment. But, Hallelujah! This night was like no
other and I deliberately held the covers differently, ready to throw them off
and leap into action.
It seemed that I didn’t have to
wait too long. It appeared in the usual menacing format and my invisible foe
knew nothing of the imminent confrontation. The first heavy boom on the stair,
Mac began to howl, I pleaded with the Lord, “Can I go now Lord whilst Its still
down the stairs and I’m above it”? “Wait” was the clear command – I asked again
and again with every footfall on the next stair. I really wanted to strike,
whatever it was, whilst it was still lower than me. But, no, that wasn’t the
Lords plan, I also knew this was a battle to be fought without the lights on, a
battle to be fought in faith and the dim glow of the outside street lamps. I
then understood that by not switching on the lights this was a faith statement and
the demons knew already that faith moves mountains and defeats the armies of
the alien.
Before long the stairs had been
climbed and the usual heavy creaking commenced directly outside our bedroom
door. I felt like a coiled spring anticipating my Lords command to charge. Till
then – Wait!
In the moments of waiting I was
thinking that I had never seen anything before, I could only hear and feel the evil.
On this night I didn’t expect much different except my reaction. Suddenly, dog
howling, son moaning and pounding his head on his pillow, the clear command
came “ARISE AND GO NOW”!
Cover thrown off, I sprang into
the darkness and hauled open the bedroom door, stood momentarily, bold,
excited, nervous. I saw nothing but felt an appalling atmosphere. I ran to my
son’s bedside, placed my hand on his head and began to rebuke and to bind the
effect of the enemy upon his soul. It was the first time that I done this with
an attitude of indignant authority, usually I’d be offering a half whimpering,
faithless plea instead of a barking command without any options. Instantly and
for the first time, Mikey come out of fitfulness and slipped back into a deep
restful sleep. That was the first surprise. Secondly, unlike other occasions
when my mind being in a fog of fear, and wanting to escape back to the slim
shred of protection that I felt my bed covers afforded me. Being less distracted
by terror I could clearly discern a strong evil presence right at the door of
his room. I knew I was being very closely watched.
I can’t really describe exactly
what happened next, but in a nervous and determined counter, I stepped within
two meters of the open door. I pointed into
the darkness at exactly where I thought the entity stood and began to reel off in
machine gun like fashion verse after verse of all that the Holy Spirit had
showed me. What happened next shocked and empowered me beyond what I could ever
imagine and you the reader will have to make a decision to accept as true or
disbelieve this account entirely. If you believe true then your life and fight
for your family will change forever.
In a split second I physically
saw a mob of large demons jamming the passageway and fleeing away as fast as they
possibly could. All were dressed like medieval soldiers in full chain mail with
belts. No swords or weapons to be seen. They jostled each aggressively in their
clamor to escape. Why they didn’t go through the walls, ceiling or floor? I
have no idea?
The passageway is short and at
the end it opened left into the guest room and right into the bathroom. But,
despite the shock at their size, number and uniform of these uninvited and unwelcome
beasts in my house, this former fearful felt no dread whatsoever. In the
ascending faith of a conqueror, in Christ’s name, I found myself surging after
them and just a few meters between us. I moved as fast as I could, they moved faster
still. It never crossed my mind what I was doing or what I would do if I actually
managed to grab one.
Scriptures continued to stream
from my lips and I followed in hot pursuit. At the end they split, half ran
into the guest room and the rest into the bathroom where I followed. Though they
were just a short distance in front of me they melted into thin air as I
entered. It wasn’t a large bathroom; there would hardly have been room for four
people let alone me never mind six or so giants? I spun quickly and entered the
guest room to follow the rest of them, also completely empty? Interestingly, I
had never liked that room; it always held a sense of foreboding. I avoided
entering it any time. Now, here in the dim
glow of the outside street lamp the room seemed bright, clean and welcoming.. Allelujah!
Gone! They were all gone, where too? Who knows or cares. I remember it like a
recent memory. I stumbled back into the now deserted hallway; I was the only
one there. I was stunned, amazed, overjoyed – in disbelief even! For many a
night this had been a terror filled place for me. I could hardly take in that
in the name of Jesus I had just chased at least a dozen very big fleeing demons
that could not get away quick enough. My word, what had just happened here? I
had seen with my own eyes how clearly terrified they had been at the rebuke of
the Lord and His sword, the word, through his little servant in boxer shorts
and T-shirt. I was thoroughly relishing the most beautiful calm and peace. I
was in awe as to how my Father had set me free in a moment of time. My
brokenness, helplessness, had made way for His glorious victory.. Twenty years
in Bible School could never have provided the revelation of that one moment in
time. I had surely witnessed the grace, mercy and power of the Living God
through me His far from perfect son?
I was able to estimate the number
of devils as I had paced the hall space and could mentally calculate that
minimum twelve maximum fifteen demons could fit into that space. They were
equal height including helmets and all almost touched the ceiling 2.4m / 8ft
ceiling. The hall width did not permit them to run exactly side-by-side but
they rushed packed together in close staggered formation. What indeed had the
Lord just shown me? Wonder of wonders. Just one of those giants in their chain
mail armour had the size and weight to crush me, why did they need so many? But
in the name of the Lord, I can run through a troop and leap over a wall.
By measuring the passage way one
foot in front of the other and knowing already that the height of the ceiling
was 2.4 meters (8 feet) I could calculate at least twelve, max fifteen demons. All
fear was gone within a moment of my confronting these evil forces and peace
& joy came like a river. I was free, my family was free, and my home was
free Allelujah! I had joy unspeakable and full of glory. But what did this all
mean? I had tapped in to the reality of the invisible realm and ancient
malignant beings. That was the beginning of the most amazing journey in
understanding
For we
wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against
powers, against the
rulers of the darkness of this world, against
spiritual wickedness in high places. Ephesians 6v12
This incredible chapter did not
end here. Quite the contrary, what happened next opened the door to a spiritual
realm that I could never imagine. Somewhat like discovering Narnia. Feel free
to email with any questions re the above experience or stay in touch for the
follow up to this testimony. Which follow up should surely change your life,
your home and your community.
In Christ alone
George
phrevival@gmail.com
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